The Good and The Bad

THE LIFE OF GLASS will be out in just over two weeks, which means two things for me right now: One, my blog tour & awesome blog tour contest start to-morrow!!, and two, I’m in the midst of prime review time for the book. This means nearly every time I open up my e-mail I’ve been seeing another Google alert with yet another review on there.

I’ve blogged before about reviews, about how waiting for that first one is one of the most nerve-wracking things I’ve gone through as a writer. And I’m not sure it’ll ever get any easier for me. This is my second book, so I’ve been through this once before (doesn’t matter, still not any easier.)

I’ve been really fortunate to have received a good number of glowing reviews for THE LIFE OF GLASS so far, including, some gorgeous pre-publication blurbs from Beth Kephart and Cecilia Galante, very, very nice reviews from both Kirkus and Booklist, a review from BookPage that was so beautiful it made me cry, and, just today, amazing reviews from both The Compulsive Reader and The Shelf Elf.

And yet, I have also seen one or two that are not so glowing. I understand that not everyone is going to like my book, and honestly, I’m okay with that. There are plenty of books I love that other people don’t and vice versa. But it is still hard to read and brush it off and forget about it, because even if I get 50 glowing reviews and one bad one, it’s the bad one that sticks in my head far longer. Why is that?

I’m not sure. Maybe it’s because a book, words, something I created is, in a way, a part of me. Every compliment feels personal, and every negative comment, even more so. Or maybe it’s some sort of deep seeded insecurity – I hang onto these negative comments, this little voice in the back of my head wondering, wondering, could it be . . . right?

One thing every author knows is that we can’t (or we shouldn’t) respond to negative reviews, and I don’t. Ever. Which is sometimes hard when I see things written about my books that are just plain factually inaccurate or completely misread. Which is hard because sometimes a book feels like a child, who you might want to defend (even if you should really just let them battle it out on the playground themselves.). It’s hard because, also, deep down, don’t we really all crave positive feedback? Don’t we all want people to like us, to like anything that’s a part of us?

My point is, I guess, that having a book come out, being in the midst of all these reviews is like being on a merry-go-round with constant ups and downs and highs and lows. There are moments when I read a review so lovely that it brings tears to my eyes, and moments where I read things that just make me feel pretty awful.

Someone recently suggested to me that I just stop looking, that I turn off the Google alerts and just look away. I have other things to do. Other books to write and revise. But I can’t stop looking. Good or bad, I feel like I need to know.

The funny thing is, I did not sit down and intend to write this post. I intended to write about my blog tour (the details of which, I will, I’m certain, bombard you with over the next three weeks!) But just before I opened up my blog, I logged onto Goodreads, and there I saw some new reviews and ratings of both THE SEPTEMBERS SISTERS and THE LIFE OF GLASS. And there I felt compelled to check them out. And there I saw that someone who I knew in high school – not someone who was a friend or an enemy but just an acquaintance -- gave one of my books a low rating. She is, of course, entitled to her opinion. But as she left only a rating and not a review, I began to wonder, why she didn’t like the book? Or, was it me she didn’t like – had she hated me back in high school and I hadn’t known? Did I ever really talk to her in high school? I couldn’t remember.

Coming up in the next three weeks, you’ll be able to read a bunch of interviews and guest posts and reviews of THE LIFE OF GLASS, and you can learn a lot about me and how I came to write this particular book and what’s up next for me as a writer and how I feel about beauty. But today I give you this, a glimpse into what’s going on in my head, as my book is about to journey into the world.

The First Review

As a writer, I've come to learn that there are few things scarier than waiting for reviews. This is true whether it's a "review" from my agent or my editor who is reading my draft for the first time and offering notes, or even a "review" from an editor who might be considering buying a new book from me, a review that will come in the form of an offer or a pass letter. I always find it nervewracking, waiting to see what other people will say, how they will react to a book that I love, that I have poured my life into for a significant period of time, that I have revised and edited and labored over, a book filled with characters that I love enough to feel like they are real, true, important people in my life.

A very wise author friend told, just around the release of The September Sisters last year, that not everyone was going to love my book. No matter what. People have opinions, and they like different things, and of course, there are plenty of books that other people love that I don't. And that's okay. But still, when it's your own book, it's hard to remember this. Waiting for reviews is scary. Especially that first review.

Which brings me to the point of this post: I got to see the first review for THE LIFE OF GLASS this week. When I saw the e-mail in my inbox from my editor, with the subject heading "Booklist Review," I kind of wanted to throw up. I was dying to know what it said, but terrified to see it. Up until that moment, up until right then, the book still felt like mine and only mine, but once I read the review, once I read what probably thousands of other people would, I'd see the book differently. I'd see it through someone else's eyes.

I sat there for a few minutes just staring at it, before I got the courage to open it and see what it said. And then I read it, and it was lovely. All of it, every single word.

Among other nice things Booklist said: "Themes of memory, beauty, and secrets come together in this thoughtful, uplifting book. . . a gentle portrait of a girl growing through her grief."

I read it. I read it again.
And then I exhaled.

A Great Review!

I wanted to share this really great review of The September Sisters posted by BookKids. They called The September Sisters a "MUST pick up" book, and said the book is, ". . . a touching, beautiful story about one girl’s struggle to find love in the rubble left by a whirlwind of unimaginable events. The September Sisters is both tragic and sweet, captured perfectly with Cantor’s striking voice." You can click here to read the whole review.

I poked around their site, and found out that BookKids is the children's section of the largest independent book store in Texas, BookPeople. It looks and sounds so awesome --I'm totally wishing I lived close enough to Austin to go hang out there!

And. . . have you noticed the countdown widget? That's right. Single digits!!! In 9 short days The September Sisters will be released! It recently occurred to me that I should do something on my release day. Any suggestions?

Review!

I came across an awesome review of THE SEPTEMBER SISTERS over at YA Book Realm, and I was so excited and awed to read it!!

Among other lovely things, YA BR says, "Jillian Cantor’s debut novel, was unforgettable with the perfect mixture of realism, great character development, and plot. . .The moment I started reading it, I seriously could not put it down until I learned more about the disappearance of Becky."

You can click here to read the whole review.

And don't forget, a little over a week left to enter my contest for the chance to win an ARC of THE SEPTEMBER SISTERS.

Happy Holidays!
Jillian

A Terrific Review!!!!

The Compulsive Reader posted an amazing early review of THE SEPTEMBER SISTERS on her blog today!! To read it, click here.

Her review is so beautiful that it made me tear up to read it! She calls the book "beautifully penned and emotional," and she says "Cantor is an extremely sensitive and yet savvy writer, and aptly describes each and every dynamic aspect of the girls' lives, giving the book a haunting and persistently real quality. "

My favorite part is the end where she says, "Cantor's impressive debut is a beautiful and heartfelt novel that will appeal to fans of Sarah Dessen, and should not be missed. "

Knowing that someone else (well, aside from my mom) read the book and truly loved it, makes me unbelievably happy! So thanks to the Compulsive Reader for a lovely review!!!

My First Review!!!!

Kidliterate posted an early review for THE SEPTEMBER SISTERS today!! Click here to read it.

I absolutely love the way the reviewer describes Abby (the main character) and her emotions. My favorite part is where she says "Very nicely written. I thought Cantor [THAT'S ME!!!] did a great job with Abby and her very complex all-over-the-map emotions."

So thanks to Kidliterate for a lovely first review!